How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk

Implementation Notes

• Acknowledge the child's feelings: It's important to acknowledge and respect the child's feelings, even if they seem insignificant. This helps the child feel understood and supported.
• Use descriptions instead of evaluations: Instead of evaluating the child's actions, describe what you see or feel. This helps the child better understand their actions and their consequences.
• Offer choices: Give the child the opportunity to choose so they feel more in control of the situation. This helps develop responsibility and independence.
• Avoid punishments: Instead of punishments, use logical consequences and discuss with the child how to rectify the situation. This promotes the development of self-discipline and understanding of cause-and-effect relationships.
• Use I-Messages: Talk about your feelings and needs using I-Messages to avoid accusations and conflicts. This helps build more open and trusting relationships.
• Listen actively: Practice active listening, showing the child that you hear and understand them. This includes repeating what was said, clarifying, and expressing empathy.
• Encourage independence: Stimulate the child to solve problems and complete tasks independently. This helps develop self-confidence and self-management skills.
• Use humor: Humor can be an effective tool for diffusing tense situations and improving mood. However, it's important to use it cautiously to avoid offending the child.
• Set clear boundaries: Define and explain rules and boundaries so the child understands what is expected of them. This helps create a sense of security and predictability.
• Be a role model: Children learn by observing adults. Show by example how to handle emotions, resolve conflicts, and behave in various situations.